Crimson
by JastlyJokely06
Summary: Claire has some inner turmoils that she cant seem to face. Her only relief comes in the color crimson. Summary sucks. It's kinda dark but Please RXR!
1. Chapter 1

**Written while I'm completely exhausted so please forgive me if it isn't too good. It's been forever since I've written a Clyrnin fic. Also it's kinda dark, so warning you now.**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the poetic verses that came from nothingness.**

_Never knowing, Always waiting _

_Tell me darling, Curious_

_What awaits after death _

_Or rather how do we tell when death arrives?_

She's waiting again, for the fourth time that week. She sits on the couch in the Glass House, elbow on the arm of it, resting her chin on her palm. Claire sighs as she checks her phone. Half past midnight and he hasn't returned. Claire sighs as she gets up from the couch and walks to the staircase, too tired and hurt to care anymore. As she takes the first few steps before she hears the door open behind her. She turns around to see Shane stumble in, drunk.

"Claire!" He hiccups as he stumbles to her, hugging her tightly. She can smell the sweat, shame, and a faint trace of females perfume on him. She wriggles out and without a word heads up to her room. She closes it silently and she hears Shane, the one she's supposed to love, curse as he goes to his room to crash. She gets to bed and for the fourth time that week, she cries.  
She wakes up with a numb feeling in her chest. She grimaces before shaking her head and strips her clothes off. She puts on a pair of old jeans and a faded grey shirt. She puts her hair up and grabs her shoes and back pack, heading downstairs to the smell of coffee. She puts her stuff down by the door then heads into the kitchen to be greeted by Eve, her best friend.

"Hey CB!" She stops when she sees the red rim eyes of Claire. She gives a weak smile before handing her a mug of coffee. She had chosen the 'special' mug that had a kiss mark with fangs that says 'love bites'. Claire chuckles before taking a sip. "So got any plans today?" Eve asks, trying to cheer her up. Claire simply shrugs.

"Not really. Going to work soon and hope to stay there til late, take the portal home to avoid trouble." She says. A slight spark enter her eyes as she mentions work with her lunatic boss Myrnin. Eve smirks as she puts a few pop tarts in the microwave oven and sits at the table.

"So McCrazy still hasn't figured, ya know, that problem?" She mentions and Claire laughs quietly to herself. She shakes her head. They recall the time when Claire had some cotton candy and persuaded Myrnin to try some. When it melted immediately Myrnin was astonished. For a week he tested it to find it's properties and how it could melt so fast.

"I'm scared he'll work me to the bone today because of it." The two laugh as they talk for a few more minutes before the kitchen door opens again. Shane steps in, eyes dark and hung over. Claire immediately looks away before saying bye to Eve. As she exits the kitchen she hears Shane follow her.

"Claire wait, can't we talk about this?" He says, his voice hoarse from the evening prior. Claire puts on her shoes and grabs her back. She opens the door and looks at Shane. She looks away in disgust.

"No. We're over Shane." She say, choking back sobs she runs out the house and onto the streets. After two or three blocks she slows down to a walk and let's the sobs take over, blinding her from walking. Her heart breaking all over again.

_Darling, You know I love you _

_Sweetheart hear my pleas _

_All you see is but a mere illusion _

_Open your mind, Your heart _

_And tell me what lies beyond life and death_

She makes it to the alley when her sobs die down to nothing. She sighs as she walks down the narrow path and smiles softly as she sees the small shack a few meters away. She opens the door and walks down the hazardous stairs. She hears the clatter of glass and metals and the soft rustles of Myrnin's slippers against the wood floors.

"Ah Claire, you've arrived! I think I finally figured out the formula for-" He stops abruptly as she reaches the bottom step. In less than a second he's standing before her. She resists the urge to scream as he stares intently at her.

"W-What?" She snaps, clearly annoyed at his incessant staring.

"You reek of heartache and tears." He says bluntly. She rolls her eyes and pushes past him to his chalkboard filled with sloppy and disorganized notes.

"Gee thanks I feel better." She says sarcastically.

"Well I highly doubt that dear Claire for the stench hasn't gone away." He replies, walking up beside her. Claire looks at Myrnin in disbelief.

"Obviously." She says bitterly. Myrnin turns Claire so she's facing him. A serious expression on his face that makes Claire study his beautiful features.

"What's wrong Claire?" He asks. She looks away and shrugs.. "Did he break your heart again?" He asks and she looks at him shocked before a small smile crosses her face.

"So you said you found the formula?" She says, hoping to draw his attention else where. It works as Myrnin goes off into a ramble about the cotton candy and other formulas Claire could care less about. It felt nice to be distracted so she let herself get caught up in the whirlwind of Myrnin's world.  
A few hours later, a box of doughnuts, and three long experiments later, Claire yawns and looks at her phone, 10pm and 4 missed calls from Shane. Claire packs her things as she yells to Myrnin that she's leaving. For the second time that say she resists the urge to scream as Myrnin appears before her, a few inches separating them.

"Myrnin?" She says weakly. His gorgeous brown eyes stare into hers deeply, before he hugs her. It was awkward and all muscle but she reciprocated it. Before he let's go he whispers in her ear.

"You're too precious to cry over a foolish male who can't appreciate you for your intelligent beauty. Don't let yourself down over him when there's someone to marvel you like the goddess you are." Claire was about to say something before the portal appears and Myrnin pushes her gently to it, disappearing in his room. She shakes off her spell of infatuation and walks into the portal. She thinks to herself that she might be falling in love with her boss, but she quickly shakes that thought away. Walking into the Glass House, she quickly regrets it. Claire sees Shane on the couch, tv off, and he turns when she walks in. She groans in frustration as he gets up to go to her.

"Claire! Where were you?! I've tried to reach you all day!" He exclaims, anger laced with worry in his voice. Claire shakes her head and walks towards the staircase before Shane grabs her wrist.

"Let me go Shane." She says sternly. He ignores this and holds on.

"Where were you? Gone off to screw your boss?" He says angrily. This makes her snap.

"What the fuck Shane! You go off four times this week to drink and come home smelling like sweat, shame, and other women and accuse ME of cheating?! No, I wasn't screwing my boss because I have more dignity and pride than you. I don't go screwing any whore while I have someone at home waiting for me!  
Don't you dare try to blame this on me when we're both aware who did what. We are done! I mean it Shane! So leave. Me. Alone!" Claire screams and she yanks her hand out of his grip. She runs up the stairs and slams the door, crying silently into her hands. She feels all the pain from the past few weeks overwhelm her. Thoughts press into her head with each sob, making the dull ache turn into full on pain.

_Take the blade, crimson love _

_Honey to a bee, it drives me closer _

_Take the blade, crimson love _

_And tell me what it's like_

She rummaged through her drawers until she finds it. A silver box cutter that she found somewhere. She opens the door just a crack, her heartbeat speeds up rapidly as she sprints to the bathroom and locks herself in. She slumps against the walls as her eyesight blurs from the tears. She takes the blade and holds it to her wrists. She cuts slowly, making a gash across her wrist, under the veins. Scars litter her arms as she continues to create her beautiful marks. When she finished her third one she hears a banging on the door.

"Claire?! Are you there?! What's going on, I smell a lot of blood! Claire open up!" Michael yells as he pounds the door. Claire smiles as she cuts one more before hearing everything blur around her. The sounds, the senses going numb. Before she feels the unconscious take hold of her, she lays on the floor. She sees a pale hand punch a hole into the door but it barely registers in her mind. She smiles to herself as she feels her pain slip away.

_Darkness, Numbness _

_Sweetheart there's nothing to fear _

_It may hurt but don't fade away _

_Grab my hand, let me bring you to life _

_Breath life to you, light your soul on fire _

_Let me give you a reason to believe _

_There's a life after death_

She awakens slowly at first. The soft beeping of machines and soft snores fill the air. Claire looks around and notices she's in the hospital. Eve and Michael are asleep on the sofa in the corner of the room. She feels someone holding her left hand, and prays it's not Shane. She turns her head and sees Myrnin, head on the side of the bed, and one hand holding hers. She smiles to herself. She gently takes her hand out of his, and notices the heavy bandages on her wrists. She momentarily ignores them and begins to stroke Myrnin's hair, making him stir lightly. He wakes up and his eyes brighten to the sight of Claire awake. He moves slowly, as if approaching a fragile deer.

"Hey." She whispers, earning her a handsome smile from him.

"Hey.." he whispers back. He cups her face with his long slim hands and kisses her softly. An explosion of fireworks erupt between the two. But as soon as he came, he broke apart. "Don't ever leave me again." There was a slight desperation, a need that Claire was drawn into. Her heart ached and longed to see Myrnin smile like he did only a few hours prior.

"I'm sorry." She whispers and he nods.

"I know, now go to sleep, you need rest." He says and she complies. She knows he will be there when she wakes up.

**Yeah bleh crappy I know but please review and tell me what you think. I decided to make this longer so I hope you like it. Please Review.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Well this was supposed to be a one-shot but I had another idea for this story. Also just to make it clear, the poem verses reflect the overall chapter not the small story after each verse. Anyways please review!**

_White innocence, lady from above _

_Show me thy wings, fly down to me _

_Black clouds of turmoil rest in thy breast _

_From white to black, thy wings transform _

_No longer thee lady of above _

_But rather mistress of below_

Myrnin watches as Claire slips back into unconsciousness. Once he was sure she was asleep he stands up, kissing her forehead, before he walks out the Psychiatric facility in the Morganville hospital. He walks down and out the hospital, it being near midnight he has nothing to worry about. He walks to the Glass House and clenches his fist so tight, his knuckles ache. He reaches the house within mere seconds thanks to his speed. He opens the door with a sadistic grin on his face, eyes turning a rust color. He looks around the livingroom before closing his eyes and letting his hearing locate his target. He darts upstairs and into Shane's room in utter silence. The dark room is nothing to his age-old eyes that spot the sleeping form on his bed. He walks over to him and cocks his head to one side, as if he is studying a new species. After a minute or two he grabs Shane by his shirt and jerks him awake. Putting him to his feet he glares daggers. Shane jolts from the surprise awakening before he gets ready to hit Myrnin. Myrnin stops him by grabbing his right fist, aimed at his gut, and squeezes with enough force to show he can shatter bones.

"Argh.." Shane yelps in pain before bitting his lip. Myrnin continues to stare at Shane, teeth bared and a low growl ripping through the silence. Putting the saying 'if looks could kill' on a whole new level.

"Listen to me mongrel," Myrnin says, an old accent hinting his angered voice. "I will not forgive you for what you did to Claire, and I promise you if something like this happens again," another low growl, "I swear I'll have your head and hang it on my mantel." He pushes him back and Shane falls on his bed, squirming to gain his composure. By the time he was on his feet Myrnin was gone. Gone to return to his troubled angel.

_Lost and forgotten You fall to your knees _

_Praying to god to spare you from these _

_Haunting and terrifying voices that speak _

_Die my sweet angel, the crimson death of peace_

Claire awakens a few hours later and smiles as she sees Michael coming in with two cups of coffee. Michael smiles his signature heart breaker smile and walks over to her bedside, sitting in the chair that Myrnin occupied.

"Hey sleeping beauty. You feeling better?" He asks and Claire nods. She tries to swallow but her throat was too dry, so she points to the container of water. Michael pours her and a cup and helps her sit up to drink it.

"Thanks." She croaks out after taking a few gulps. Michael smiles sadly before leaning back in his chair. Glancing at Eve than back at her, he shakes his head.

"You know Eve will kill you for pulling a stunt like that." He says matter-of-factly. Claire smiles weakly, the pain meds still in effect. She sighs and turns her head towards Eve.

"I'm sorry.." She whispers, barely audible but she knew Michael could hear her. He sighs and grabs her hand in his.

"I know, but next time Claire, tell us when somethings wrong. You shouldn't have to resort to this." He says gently and she looks into his blue eyes. 'He's lying. They don't care.' A small voice in the back of her head whispers. Claire forces a smile and nods. She closes her eyes and bites he lower lip.

"Wake Eve up, I rather have her kill me now than later." She forces a strained laugh. Michael nods and walks over to Eve. He wakes her gently and hands her the coffee he bought her. She takes a sip, eyes still closed and sighs. When she opens them she gets up and walks over to Claire and for a long moment they hold each others gaze. After a few moments in silence, Eve hugs Claire tightly and chokes back a sob.

"Oh god Claire..I thought you was gone.." she whispers and breaks apart, until she's arms length away. She studies her closely before lightly hitting Claire on the head. "Don't you EVER do that again! Do you hear me CB?" She scolds and Claire does laugh this time. She nods and they talk for a while before the pain meds kick in again and put her back to sleep. 'This is all a lie. Nobody wants you.' The voices whispers before she falls completely unconscious.

_Bloody palms, bloody skin _

_Angel you did it again _

_So terrifyingly beautiful _

_The way the crimson surrounds you _

_My angel I promise to be here _

_Even when the crimson rivers run dry_

Myrnin makes his way back to the hospital via portal. He gets there as soon as she fell back asleep. He mentally curses himself that he wasn't there like he promised. He says goodbye to Michael and Eve as they go back home for the morning. He smiles as he sees Claire's sleeping form, her hair falling over her eyes as she shifts in her bed. He sits beside her in his earlier seat and thinks to himself 'how did this happen?'  
A few hours later a nurse comes in to tell him she can go home now. He nods stiffly, uncomfortable with other humans. He looks back at Claire and smiles. He gets up and pulls out hiss cell phone, the one Claire forced him to get, and calls Michael. He informs him that he should pick up Claire unless he wants her to have a heart attack if he drives. Michael agrees to meet him in a couple of minutes and hangs up.  
All around her, Claire can feel her friends comfort and love, but yet somehow it didn't seem right. Something wasn't right. She sits in her subconscious as the meds keep her asleep, facing herself. The other Claire looked exactly the same except for the dark glint in her eyes and the menacing smirk on her face.

"You know they don't care. Who would care about you?" It says to her. She shakes her head violently and glares at her split image.

"You're lying. They do care, Michael, Eve, Myrnin, they all care." She protests. The other Claire just shakes her head in disapproval.

"Yeah sure, or maybe its for show? Amelie could easily tell them to act so your parents don't think anything bad and take you away. No one likes you, they are only using you. Just like Shane did." The comment stung more than she thought it would. Claire winces and averts her gaze.

"No..you're lying.." her weak voice gave away how vulnerable she was now.

"It's true. Why do you think he kept doing it? Time after time and you knew. You knew he didn't care deep down yet you stayed. 'Cause its the right thing to do.'" The dark Claire laughs a weird twisted laugh that makes Claire terrified.

"Stop it.." She whispers, looking at her feet.

"There's a way to make it all go away you know." It says. Claire's head snaps up at this and the other smirks. "You only started it. You did it the wrong way though. Vampires can easily smell blood on the outside, but not if they aren't there." It says and Claire's eye widen in fear and shock.

"W-Will..will it make the pain go away?" She asks, her voice sounding small, fragile. The other nods and stands up, offering her hand.

"Come, time for you to wake up. If you want the pain to stop, you know what to do." Claire nods slowly, and takes the hand of her inner self. Slowly waking to the world she fears.

_Angel, can you trust me?_

_Although you cry and scream _

_They've broken you too many times _

_But I will guide you from the edge _

_Angel, will you trust me?_

**Sorry I know this was bland and not much interesting happened but next chapter will be better. Please review what you think!**


	3. Chapter 3

Why_ do you look so sad my angel_

_Your eyes tell tales as old as time_

_Why do you pretend to be happy_

_When on the inside your breaking_

_Piece by piece falls from you_

_From heaven to down below_

Claire has been under constant supervision since she got home two weeks ago. She was always home with either Michael, Eve, or even Myrnin. She pretended to be happy with Michael or Eve so they didn't worry. Yet somehow Myrnin always got her to confess how she really felt. Myrnin would busy her with what he knew would make her happy. Science. She seemed content enough through his eyes. He had to make his plan perfect before she could truly be happy.

"If only I could live in the lab and be surrounded by science all the time. I think I'd be happy." She thought aloud one day during one of their harmless experiments. Michael didn't trust Myrnin enough with chemicals and unstable Claire in the house, so they resorted to bacteria and virus identification.

"But then I'd be there and make everything a mess." Myrnin says calmly. On the inside he was excited she said that. He loved Claire, more than possibly Ada, but he couldn't admit it although it kills him. Her perfect hair, face, her eyes that stare deep down to his soul, if he had one. But more importantly, her mind. So intellectual and kind, her personality and just everything about her.

"I wouldn't mind. I really enjoy your company." She says. 'And you love him though you don't want to admit it.' The darker Claire whispers inside her head. 'You're sick for loving a vampire, no wonder Shane cheated on you. Who would love someone like you?' This makes Claire flinch physically. Myrnin notices and looks at her, worry crossing his expression.

"Claire?" Claire turns away and walks to the kitchen. Little does he know she's silently crying.

As the days pass, slowly Michael and Eve begin to trust Claire by herself, although they don't leave the house. Myrnin visits start to stop as he puts his plan into motion. He opens a portal to Amelie's studies. Walking through the portal Amelie looks at him, slightly annoyed.

"Haven't you heard of the door? Or at least knocking?" She says icily. Myrnin shrugs this off and jumps into the reason he's there.

"I want Claire to move in with me."

_I turn away for a moment_

_To go to heavens gate and summon thee_

_Yet you turn from heavens light and fall_

_Your shine is gone, white turns to black_

_Your innocence leaks away I jump without thought_

_And hope to catch you_

Claire walks around the empty house. Not really paying attention to detail but sound. She walks downstairs and realizes she's completely alone. She walks into the kitchen and sees a note on the refrigerator.

_'Claire,_

_Eve went to work and Amelie has summoned me for something. I'll be home at 1._

_Michael'_

Claire opens the fridge, grabs a coke, and head backs upstairs. Sitting down on the floor against her bed, she closes her eyes and takes a deep breath. She retreats inside her head back to the blank empty space where her darker side resides.

"I don't think I can do this." She says slowly. The darker Claire stares in disgust at her.

"What do you mean you can't? We agreed on this!" It yells at her. Claire looks at herself. The dark eyes that reflect hers shows all her pain and loneliness.

"What about Eve and Michael? And Myrnin seems to want me around." She says in a low voice, averting her eyes.

"There you go, putting hope into nothing again. They don't care about you. Why do you think they left you alone?"

"They had things to do! I can't keep them here forever!" She protests. Tears rim her chocolate eyes.

"Excuses! They don't want to be around you anymore!" It yells at her. "Like you believed Shane when he said it wouldn't happen again! Stop being naïve!" Tears fall silently as Claire looks at her clenched fists. Trying to find something to keep her holding on.

"Myrnin..He..he has to care.." she whispers hopelessly. The darker Claire walks to her and puts it's hand on her cheek. Making her look at its eyes. Extreme loneliness, despair, and pain shoot through Claire's body.

"He doesn't care. That's why he stopped coming. Even he doesn't want you anymore. Come now. It's time." It says and through the thick tears she snaps back to her body. Claire puts a hand to her face to see that she was crying in real life too. She sighs and gets up, going to her closet she searches for the small box she hid. She finds it and opens it, taking out her old box cutter that she hid when she returned. Walking to her small desk in her room she takes a piece of paper, and begins writing.

_My love, why are you crying_

_I found you broken below_

_Your wings are hurt, like your soul_

_You cling to a string of your innocence_

_Letting the demons get the best of you_

_But I promise I'll _ soon my love_

_For I shall follow you in to the __

Myrnin smiles to himself as he paces around the lab, figuring out what to fix for Claire's arrival. Suddenly a sharp pain shoots through his body. He opens a portal, a very bad feeling in his (metaphorical) gut. He rushes through the portal to the Glass House and pauses as soon as he's there. The smell of rust, guilt, and sweet strawberries fill the atmosphere.

"Claire!" He yells, rushing, vampire speed to where the source of the smell is coming from. The scenery changes to Claire's room, and Myrnin's eyes fall upon the beautiful but horrifying scenery. Claire's limp body is on the floor as if she posed before her death. Her right hand by her face in a fist, clutching a paper. The left hand behind her, holding her favorite pen. The box cutter, which Myrnin assumes is the weapon of this mess, is a few inches from her right hand. A pool of blood surrounds Claire, both wrists slit. It felt like minutes to Myrnin but it was only a few seconds he was staring at her. He goes to her and lifts her up and cradles her. He can hear a faint heartbeat and he notices her wrist still bleeding. He quickly rips two strips from his shirt and ties them tightly on each wrist. After a minute the bleeding stops.  
He picks her bridal style and the note falls to the floor. He picks it up and places it in his vest pocket. He take out the cell phone and calls the hospital, telling them to bring an ambulance right away. He waits and hears Claire's heart beat a little stronger. Once in the ambulance he watches it until it's out of sight. He sighs and funs his long slender hand through his hair. That's when he remembers the paper and takes it out.

_'Dear Michael, Eve, and Myrnin,_

_I'm sorry that I did this, but I couldn't help it anymore. My soul is broken, hurt, and I realized all I did, all I am, is a burden to you all. I won't be any more, and I'll be gone for good. Myrnin, I'm sorry that I wasn't good enough but I want you to know I love you and I'll meet you in the afterlife. Goodbye my friends._

_Claire'_

Myrnin drops the letter and in a split second is out the door, and running full speed to the hospital. He ignores the smoking skin and slight burn as he goes past the nurses and into the room where Claire is held. He finds her by scent, and when he sees her, hooked up to machines and blood bags, he almost loses all control. Almost.

_You think no one's there_

_You think demons care_

_But honey you don't see do you?_

_I'm here waiting for you_

_And honey I won't leave_

_I'll banish those demons and then,_

_I'll show you I care And that I love you_

A dark cloud surrounds Claire as she floats along in her subconscious. She stares through the cloud, a faint voice in the distance. She concentrates on it, and a picture appears slowly.

"Claire don't leave me.." Myrnin. He holds her hand and tears stream down his face. Claire can only stare in wonder and astonishment. "I love you. Why did you do this if you love me too?" He whispers.

"Oh god..what did I do?" Claire whispers. Thick tears start to stream down her cheeks.

"He's lying." Claire spins around to face herself. "He doesn't care-"

"Shut up! Just shut up! He's crying because of what I did!" Claire yells. She clenches her fist until her knuckles are white. "He cares about me! You're the one who doesn't! I shouldn't have done that. Oh God! No..No get out! Get out of my head! Just leave me alone!" She yells, body trembling in pure rage. The darker Claire stares for a moment before it disappears, completely gone and never to return. Claire stands still for a moment, willing herself to wake up. And slowly, she does.

"Hey.." Claire croaks out. Myrnin's head snaps up, their eyes meet.

"Claire!" Myrnin exclaims. Claire winces.

"Ow..loud.." she says and Myrnin looks down in embarrassment. "We need to talk.." Myrnin nods and they do.  
Claire tells Myrnin about her other self. About how she felt alone, and unwanted. They talk for hours about her deepest fears. After a while they stop and enjoy the silence between them.

"I love you. I was really afraid you didn't want me." She finally says after a long silence. Myrnin stares at her intently before replying.

"I love you too my dear Claire. I always wanted you. I will always be here for you." He says and caresses her face gently.

"I'm sorry.." she whispers. Myrnin stands up and hovers over Claire, making her breath hitch.

"Promise to never leave me again?" He asks seriously. Claire looks into his and nods.

"I promise."

"Good." He leans down and before Claire can register what's happening, he kisses her. A slow, long, loving kiss. Claire returns it and part for her need breath. "You make me believe there's a heaven out there to go to." He says softly. Claire smiles and looks at him playfully.

"So what does that mean?" Myrnin smiles and kisses her gently.

"You're my angel."

_Through thick and thin, even if you fall_

_I will be there for you, through it all_

_When crimson showers you in it's beauty_

_I will be there to kiss you_

_I will be there to hold you_

_Through thick and thin_

_You will always be my crimson angel_

**This is the final chapter. Thanks for reading please leave feedback! Sorry if the endings kinda rushed, but I did my best! Please review!**


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